Believe In Yourself

“BELIEVE IN THE SELF YOU ARE NOW IN THE PROCESS OF BECOMING.”DR. LESLIE WEATHERHEAD

Dr. Leslie D. Weatherhead, author of Prescription for Anxiety, has valuable advice relative to visualization. He remarked,

If we have in our minds a picture of ourselves as fear-haunted and defeated nobodies, we must get rid of that picture at once and hold up our heads. That is a false picture and false must go. God sees us as men and women in whom and through whom He can do a great work. He sees us as already serene, confident, and cheerful. He sees us not as pathetic victims of life, but masters of the art of living; not wanting sympathy, but imparting help to others, and therefore thinking less and less of ourselves, and full, not of self-concern, but of love and laughter and a desire to serve. Let us look at our ’real selves’ which are in the making the moment we believe in their existence. We must recognize the possibility of change and believe in the self we are now in the process of becoming. That old sense of unworthiness and failure must go. It is false and we are not to believe in what is false.

And Dr. Harry Emerson Fosdick explained, “Hold a picture of yourself long and steadily enough in your mind’s eye and you will be drawn toward it. Picture yourself vividly as defeated and that alone will make victory impossible. Picture yourself vividly as winning and that alone will contribute immeasurably to success.”

“GREAT LIVING STARTS WITH A PICTURE, HELD IN YOUR IMAGINATION, OF WHAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO DO OR BE.”DR. HARRY FOSDICK

It took Jack, age 53, many years to complete his Masters Degree. Jack reported that what got him through the tough times was “visualizing what I wanted.” He said, “I never lost the vision. If you see it in your mind, you will eventually gravitate toward it.” His advice? “Day dream a lot! See yourself enjoying your dream!”

Susan, age 29, used visualization to help her through childbirth. In her words: “I wanted to experience childbirth without medication. I tried to relax and visualize the entire process. I told myself that I was in control of the pain; it was not in control of me. I thought, ’You can handle the pain and make it through.’ And I knew the power of the mind over the body: if I allowed myself to think for one moment that the pain was unbearable, it instantly became so! However, as soon as I returned to thinking I could control it – that the pain was for a purpose – I could endure it; the pain lessened and I was able to make it through the contraction.”

Kathy, age 28, was miserable while struggling to overcome an eating disorder. Kathy explained that during her challenging days “I tried to keep in mind all the things I wanted to do in my life such as get married, have a family, excel in a career. I thought about how my behavior would prevent me from reaching my goals. I would also try to remind myself that I was not a quitter and the way I was behaving was in fact the easy way out. My advice is to believe in yourself and know that you can do whatever it is you want to do.”

Review these facts and consider how you can use them to become your ideal self:

• Anything you imagine to be true is accepted as true by your subconscious mind.
• An imagined experience is perceived and acted on by your subconscious mind exactly the same as a real experience.
• Your behavior follows what you believe to be true.

For those who desire an answer to the question, “Exactly how does this work?” I’m including a brief explanation of how the left and right sides of the brain function. Bobbe Sommer, of the Maxwell Maltz Foundation, explained it in her book Psycho-cybernetics 2000. The following is just a portion of the information learned from neuropsychologist Roger W. Sperry’s split-brain experiments that earned him a Nobel prize.

HOW DOES THIS WORK?

Communication between the two halves of the brain (right and left hemispheres) is controlled principally by a bundle of nerve fibers called the corpus callosum. Sperry and his students studied patients in whom this nerve bundle had been surgically cut in an attempt to control epileptic seizures. In these people the two brain hemispheres functioned independently of one another. Sperry found that each half of the brain has its own conscious thought processes and its own memories.

In 97% of us, the left brain controls the ability to produce and understand speech; the right brain enables us to form, store and respond to sensory data, such as when we put on our clothes, find our way to a known location or recognize a face. When a word was flashed to a split-brain subjects’ right hemisphere, she was unable to speak the word. The “verbal” left brain had not seen the word; the “visual” right brain knew what it was, but could not speak it. When a subject’s right brain was shown a picture of an apple, he could not name the object; but when his left hand (controlled by the right brain) was then given several unseen objects to choose from, he identified the apple.

THE LEFT BRAIN IS LOGICAL, ANALYTICAL AND REASONABLE. THE RIGHT BRAIN IS INTUITIVE, IMPULSIVE, AND PASSIONATE.

The left brain comprehends an object by its name; the right brain by the way it looks or feels. When you’re doing your taxes you use the left side of your brain. When you are afraid of something, it’s the right side at work. It has not been fully established what causes these differences in function, but it seems clear that the abilities of both cerebral hemispheres are necessary for a full human existence.

Generally, we think of the left brain as working with the conscious mind, while the right brain tends to partner with the subconscious mind. That’s why simply using “willpower” often becomes “won’t power;” because, since the way you behave is intimately bound up with your self-image, you’re not going to change it by attacking the problem with the part of your brain that deals in words. Trying to change your behavior through your left brain (talking about it instead of visualizing it) is frustrating because it doesn’t work very well.

For example, Spencer could tell himself logically that there was no reason why he should be afraid of public speaking. His left brain would say, “There isn’t anything to be afraid of – the people in the audience are just like you. It will be fine!” But in his right brain, Spencer saw himself standing awkwardly in front of the group and blubbering his way through a presentation. All the logic in the world wasn’t going to change that image! You see, his right brain simply couldn’t process the logic it was given because it only deals with how things look or feel. And so, my readers, it follows that:

THE KEY TO POSITIVE CHANGE IS TO CREATE POSITIVE IMAGES AND EXPERIENCES WITH THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE BRAIN AND TO USE POSITIVE COMMUNICATION (INCLUDING GOOD SELF-TALK AND HELPFUL AFFIRMATIONS) WITH THE LEFT SIDE OF THE BRAIN.

I REPLAY MY WINS

Has a story ever changed your life? Occasionally, I hear a story that gives me an “ah-ha!” moment. I love it when that happens! Here’s a true story:

One summer during the 1950’s, a bright Stanford University student labored over a difficult physics problem. Finally, he decided to ask his father for help. This young man’s father was not just any ordinary guy – he was a Nobel-prize-winning scientist. As the wise scientist studied his son’s problem, he asked, “Isn’t this problem similar to one we worked on last week?”

His son answered, “Yes, I guess so . . . ” Then his father asked, “Well, what have you been thinking about this week . . . I mean, when you were walking along, or in the shower, or driving? Weren’t you thinking about this problem?”

His son admitted that, no, he didn’t think about the problem at all. The brilliant father then asked a question which his son never, ever forgot. He said,

“What do you think about when you don’t have to think about anything?”

His son admitted that he didn’t think about science. And then, with a sad expression on his face, the wise father remarked, “Then you better not be a scientist. You should go into whatever field you think about when you don’t have to think about anything.”

I would like to ask you that same question. “What do you think about when you don’t have to think about anything? Where do you allow your thoughts to take you?”

Your answer is a marvelous indicator of your self-image. People who are emotionally healthy focus on positive things like:

• Their past achievements.
• What they can learn from the challenges in their lives.
• Their goals.
• How they can help others.

People who are emotionally unhealthy spend their time thinking negatively. They:

• Berate themselves for past failures.
• Blame others for their problems.
• Resent people and they plan ways to “get even.”
• Think about their weaknesses and the reasons they’re unhappy.

Consider your thoughts carefully. Ralph Waldo Emerson reminds us, “A man is what he thinks about all day long.”

I’d like to suggest: When you don’t have to think about anything, replay your wins!

Replaying your wins is just what it sounds like. During moments when your mind isn’t required to produce something significant, think about the times in your life when you did something well – when you accomplished something you’re proud of. Think about the good things in your life, the happy moments. Recall, for example, the times when you’ve won something, like a promotion, a scholarship, a race – even a spelling bee! Think about loved ones and people whose lives you’ve touched for good. Remember happy moments that make you smile. And think about those things whenever you’re tempted to be negative, to blame others, or to insult yourself because of weaknesses or bad decisions in the past.

Imagine your mind as producing an ongoing stage or movie presentation. In the Theater of Your Mind, you can play whatever scenes you choose. What I’m suggesting is that you flick back on your wins every chance you get; especially during those times when you don’t have to think about anything.

Here are ideas of past ’wins’ you can imagine in great detail, and some positive questions you can ask yourself:

• I remember the time when my friends and I were…That was such fun!
• I remember that wonderful teacher who really cared about me…
• I remember how Mom used to…  And Dad always…
• I sure appreciate how my brother (sister/grandma/uncle) cares about me. He…
• I learned a lot from that experience. I learned to…  And now I’m better at…because of it.
• I love this weather! I can…now, but I can’t during the other seasons.
• I sure enjoyed winning that… You know, I was pretty good at that!
• I love those people. They are so kind and good. I remember when we…
• I sure do enjoy a good book; I learn so much! From that book I learned…
• How can I use this information to be a better person?
• What I can do today to improve myself?
• What I can do to help lighten someone’s load today?
• What’s great about today?

In William Shakespeare’s play “As You Like It” he wrote: “All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players. And one man in his time plays many parts.”

During your moments on life’s stage, shouldn’t one of your parts be the optimist . . . the builder-upper . . . the believer . . . the joyful one? Flick back on your wins every chance you get, and, as you are lifted by the positive pictures you create in your mind, you’ll be better equipped to lift others.

Before we leave this principle, I’d like to share a wonderful story told by Rachel Naomi Remen, MD. She is the author of the outstanding book, My Grandfather’s Blessings (Penguin Putnam).

Years ago, I cared for a desperately sick two-year-old boy with bacterial meningitis. Deeply unconscious, Ricardo lay in a nest of IV lines and monitor cords, his tiny body almost hidden by the technology that supported and documented his struggle to live. His mother, a slight Filipina woman, sat at the foot of his bed day after day. She even slept there, sitting in her chair and leaning forward across the mattress. Whenever any of us came to examine Ricardo or draw blood from him, we would find her there, often with her eyes closed, one hand under her baby’s blanket. She was holding on to his foot.

After he began to recover and the life-support equipment was withdrawn, I asked her about this. She smiled and looked away, a little embarrassed. But she told me that for all those days she had felt that his life depended on her holding on to his foot. Moved, I asked her what had been going on in her mind all that time. Had she been praying for his recovery? No, she told me, while she was holding his foot, she would just close her eyes and dream her dreams for him.

Day after day, she would watch him grow up. She would imagine taking him to his first day of school, see him learning to read and to write and play ball, sit in church at his first communion, watch him graduate from high school, dance at his wedding. She would imagine him as the father of her grandchild. Over and over and over again. She flushed slightly. “Perhaps,” she told me, “it made a difference.”

Dr. Remen then added, “Sometimes we may strengthen the life in others when we have an image of the future and hold on to it fiercely, much as Ricardo’s mother did.”
~ Dr. Paula

 Become Who You Want to Become                                    Change Your Thoughts